Face Lick Worthy

Rhett, the prettiest man alive (pic courtesy of TR's front row posse action)

So in the not so distant past I might have been known for making fun of BetweenBars and Tequila Red for their "cult-like obsession with crap-ass bands I have never heard of." During my tenure in Chicago it can be safely said that on a 100 occasions I rolled my eyes, sighed loudly, cursed them for not Gold Coasting it up with me on concert nights, and of course loudly refused to go every time they tried to drag me to a show. I was sure I never ever wanted to listen to their weird music. After all, BB is the one who subjected me to Teegan and Sarah who made my brain bleed, really I swear. Because of this, I was long convinced the only neutral ground Indie loving BB and me, the Pop Princess, would only ever agree on was JT, Brit, Kelly Clarkson, and the random Liz song that I enjoy screaming at the top of my lungs, Polyester Bride. Needless to say, the music on our road trips was always an eclectic mix between the two of us...especially when I was forced to serenaded her with Chain of Fools in my best Aretha voice because we couldn't agree on any common music that day.

Anyway, I digress...

As I near 26, elder wisdom appears to be oozing out of me lately. From what I have learned in the past is that the best wise people can admit when they are wrong. So ladies for you.........yes, I admit it, Rhett is man pretty. Rhett is funny. Rhett is charming. And damn it, I do want to lick his face, a lot! You might have been right along.

Rhett is talented, his songs still make me want to jump off a bridge though. Don't let it get to your heads! Just remember, it is rare when I am wrong. I still contend Trixies over Hipsters any day, Bucky Badger always trumps Touchdown Jesus (sorry about that God), and sorority life is more fun than the GID lifestyle.

Anyway, Tequila, Concert Josh and Madison thank you for enlightening me last night at the Rhett concert. Also thanks to Belle and F (the only non-blogger of the social circle last night) for losing their Rhett virginity with me, you were gentle.

Homecoming 2005

Friday night reunion at the Dane

Visiting Purdouche Bags were put on alert...The College Crew was back in Madison for the weekend in full force to celebrate homecoming. The old school kiddies ransacked bars, 10 boots were drank by 10 people (at least that was the last count we could collectively remember), sorority and fraternity houses visited, too much pizza was eaten and memories re-lived. Ahhh, it's good to be us!


Re-living the College Days when we could actually handle a drink in each hand

And the rest of the weekend, a pictorial:

Left: Tsk, Tsk...no more drinkies! Right: Divo: The Sugar Daddy Atty


Left: I win! My first finished boot. Right: Task prior to passing out at the Essen


Left: Are you happy now Bangser? Right: HK, looking hot, so hot I think someone should make out with her on my couch as I scream and then make fun of you....just a thought..

Question: What does this Minxy crew have in common?




Answer: They all have/had birthdays this week.

Happy Birthday Lisa O, Jenna, Sarah and Molly my darling fellow Scorps, love ya!

WEEK FROM HELL!

What I have done this week so far....

Sunday- Field Trip to the ER
Pro: HOTT doctor took care of me.
Con: I started talking crazy after I was injected with a form of morphine.

Monday- Off to work because I am stubborn and ridiculous
Pro: Got to go home because the office manager loves me/was still a little loopy in the head.
Con: Didn't get to watch a single trashy talk show because I slept the entire day.

Tuesday- Back to work, again, this time for real, kinda
Pro: Started to tackle the pile on my desk, got to take nap at work (see below).
Con: Turned ghost white and nearly fainted during a presentation.

Wednesday- Busy Bee Day!
Pro: Got a million things done including the part of desk pile, sent out an Evite, fixed someone else's mess at work, bought Halloween costume and much needed ink cartridges, and made Shauna B wear a stupid hat just so I could laugh at her during our shopping excursion.
Con: Mini-anxiety attack several times today and nearly lost my cute little Prada purse at the Halloween store.

Yes, it is just been a Fan-freaking-tastic week, in the most sacastic way. Thank God the weekend starts tomorrow with Task's arrival in Madison!

Sorry to my bestie SB, apparently I am a cruel, cruel person when stressed out.

Love you long time!

Paul hearts Madison

Holy fucking shit! God loves Barry.

Bring The Axe back to Madison.

Pre-Qualified

That is it. Last night signaled the last two “hanging-outs” that I ever go on. Gone are the days of pseudo-dating and/or giving the weaklings a chance. If you are male and your are not already my friend or a friend of one of my close friends, I don’t want to see you, talk to you, befriend you and especially not “ hang out” and pseudo-date you. Men, minus my male cohorts whom I love dearly, are all idiots, hell even the beloved ones have been known to be stupid at times, but at least I know they have redeeming qualities that make me eventually forgive them. Why it has taken my so long to realize this kind of scares me. I will call it optimism, not naivety.

Yes, from this point forward, men must now be pre-qualified in order to even be welcome into the social circle.

Yep, last nights two hanging outings went that well....

Date #1: I called off the coffee consumption after 45 minutes, yes it was that terrible that I couldn’t even give him a full hour of my life. If you keep on persisting that “we must hang out” even when I tell you repeatedly that I have little time in an attempt to discourage your wooing, finally convince me to get coffee, talk a big game on IM about your “crazy lifestyle” (as a kindergarten teacher....right), and then cannot even give me decent eye contact or make interesting convo, I will hate you. I will then make you squirm. In 45 minutes I managed to talk politics and religion. I scared him with my lefty liberal talk and bash the emperor G Doub, who he voted for twice. On purpose. I think my favorite part of the night was when he said that military benefits were an important decision in his political views because his brother is in the Armed Forces. Hmmmm, someone tell me if I am wrong, but I am pretty sure that the Republicans are the ones who are notorious for cutting Vet’s benefits. Bastards. You’re an idiot. Get your issues straight. The only positive thing that I have to say about this guy is that he had lovely teeth.

Date #2: If someone were to, let’s say, verbalize the following: “Hey Elle, you know there is this cool event at Mercury tomorrow night, you should totally come with us,” followed by exiting the salon with me for the sole purpose to ask me to dinner, and then agreeing to call the next day to arrange a time to meet up for the event, wouldn’t you think, “Hey great, sounds like Thursday night is going to be a good time?” Yea, or not so much. You cannot quasi-ask to hang out with me and then not call me with the meet up time, it was your idea dumbass, not mine. I will then also have to hate you too. I will then gather Shauna B and her co-workers to go to the function with me, inform you about your membership to my exclusive bastard list and then proceed to have a good time sans your presence. Stooopid, seriously.

Double Your Pleasure, Double The Fun

Thursday night is going to be interesting to say the least, veeeeery least.

I have somehow found myself in a position of having 2 pseudo dates scheduled for tomorrow night.

Date #1: 5:00pm coffee with a Kindergarten teacher. I have pre-disqualified him as a potential suitor mainly because over IM his inevitable push-over true colors tendencies began shining through. I am giving him one shot though, one of these days a one of these lame duck dudes will prove me wrong...

Date #2: A Midnight DVD release party of Jello/mud wrestling being shown exclusively at Mercury with the hairdresser and his punky cool co-workers.

Now you tell me which one I am going to have more fun at....

The Answers

Three Truths and a Lie:

1) True. I will not say publically who this Rocker is for a variety of good reasons, but mainly because I enjoy her music and that would therefore be disrespectful of me (see, I can be respectful at times..). Plus, I am not so sure her husband knew about her boyfriend anyway... It should also be noted for you curious types, I never actually dated the dude who broke up with the Rock Star and didn't even kiss him until years after this revelation. And no jerks, I did NOT steal her BF, not even close.

2) True. The original artist has recorded it, the major record studio now owns it, but they haven't re-released it main stream.....yet.

3) True. Most people know that I am German and Irish, but everyone forgets that I am English too. My aunt subscribed to some expensive genealogy thing and after plunking in names and DOBs it was revealed that we are related to the WWII British PM. Fan-freaking-tastic, right?

4) False. I have never been a private shopper and I don't know any Governor's wives, though my dad is pals with a former Gov.

I Wanna Play!

I am a copy-cat. I wanna play 3 truths and a lie too:

1) A boy once dumped a famous female rock star because he wanted to date me instead;
2) A major recording studio owns a song about me;
3) I am related to Winston Churchill;
4) I once had a gig as a personal shopper for ritzy clients while working at a department store, one of my regular and favorite clients was a governor's wife.

So, which 3 are real? Do you know?

American Psycho

Today I was told two things:
1) Klabanoff accused me of being a Yenta; and
2) Shelly informed me that out of all her friends, I was the one most likely to commit murder.

I really am not sure how I feel about either.

Yenta is probably an accurate description of myself, meddling is a fun game after all, but a murderer? I do remember reading somewhere that Scorpios out of all astrological signs are the ones who are murdered the most, but I don't remember reading that we are irrational psycho-paths. Easily jealous, vengeful, and constantly scheming, but of particularly clear and sound mind on a consistent basis. Hmmmm, thoughts to ponder, perhaps ya'll better stay on my good side now that I think more about this...

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Upon further investigation, I found this lady who believes that astrologically I will not become one of Wisconsin's finest serial killers ala Dahmer and Gein.]

Chicago, Chicago..

Katie and I, still in recovery mode from our long night out with the boys, drove to Chicago to stay with KV for the weekend. Friday night was highlighted by tasty Emilio's tapas and 3 pitchers of equally tasty sangria. Oops.

Saturday, or Badger Football Game Day as I like to call it, took us to Evanston to see the WI/Northwestern game at Ryan Field. While it was great to watch the Sea of Red take over the stadium, it was not so great to watch to see my team suck it up BIG TIME. Since we had little to entertain us on the field, we resorted finding it elsewhere.


Socks, mittens, same thing, it was cold out damn it...


This bastard of a child is probably going to need therapy later on in life, we gave him the Asshole cheer.


This guy might be my hero. Please notice that he painted his head red and white.


At one point in the towards the end of the game, we told Kristi to pray that Sucko won't ruin our last ditch attempt at winning the game. God apparently hates Kristi.

Up In My Grill

With nothing better to do on Thursday, Madison and I road tripped to a Milwaukee burb to visit Katie and Eric. K and E live in a new perfect little house in perfect little town. Their town should be likened to a 50's movie set with everything white picketed and perfectly manicured. Think perfection like Gattaca or Stepford in a less creeptastic way. After making fun of their cutesy town (in a lovable way), K and E ushered us the local saloon and after 6 rounds of Jack and Cokes (or Jack and Diet for Madison), the boys decided that we needed to grill steaks. It should be noted that the time of this revelation was 2am and we had to go grocery shopping prior to grilling in the 35 degree weather.


Eric, the Midnight Master Griller


The Feast circa 3am

It should also be mentioned that the feast also included Jalepano poppers, Salt and Vinegar chips, a veggie tray that cost more than the steaks, and Jack courtesy of Madison.

Make it Stop!

Sarah came to visit this weekend. For the special occasion of her presence in back in Madison we went out Thursday, Friday, Saturday and had lunch today. Needless to say, in between she and I, we consumed close to a vat of Vodka Redbulls, just to keep the party going and to live up the short time she was here... I would like to say that we drank so much of the liquid crack because we enjoy it, however it was merely to stay awake, as we are both are turning semi-old within the next 30 days. We are sad individuals. Here is a run-down of our weekend, pictorial style:

Thursday: Day 1 of the Weekend of Booze

Ele and Sarah, "Let the Celebration begin!"

The Crew: Sarah, Elle, Klabanoff, Lexi, Shauna B, Jeff, and Madison
Bars visited: Brats, Paul's Club, Angelic
Run-ins: 3 Delts, an ex-BF, a best friend of a former crush

Friday: Day Two of the Weekend of Booze

Shauna B, Sarah and Klabanoff (Note Sarah's drink..I wasn't lying..)

The Crew: Hungover Sarah and Elle, Klabanoff, Lexi, Lexi's BF Erik, and Shauna B
Bars Visited: Monday's (only for you Sarah...yuck), and Madison's
Recap: Shampoo effect in full force for Elle, one strong Monday's drink was all it took, tasty Ian's pizza visited, discussion with strangers in line about who was getting the last Mac and Cheese, Elle called intimidating my meek law student.

Saturday: Day 3 of the Weekend of Booze

Lucy and Ethel would have been proud of the mess we made...

Prior to the evening's festivities, there was a road Trip to a Winery, where grapes were stomped and feet turned purple. Shauna B, Elle, HK and Erin run a muck in Small Town, USA.

Now on to the Evening...


1) HK and Elle; 2)Sarah and Andy at The Plaz

The Crew: Sarah, Elle, HK, Klabanoff, Andy, Lexi
Bars visited: The Plaz and Madison Ave (yes, the former cheesy Bullwinkles/Club Amazon)
Recap: Andy misses EVERYTHING remotely scandalous in nature, Klabanoff found to be a decent dancer, all ladies present were impressed, HK's birthday present gets busted out...


1) HK ponders a career change from legal advise to law enforcement;
2) the things we do to for amusement...

Sunday: Day 4 of the Weekend of Booze

[Photo of us smiling while lunching should go here except the Sunday laziness hit early and hit us hard. Not a single camera was whipped out, crazy, I know..]

The Crew: Sarah, Elle, Shauna B, HK, Klabanoff, Boisen, Andy, Lexi and Erik
Bars Visited: Amy's
Recap: Though it would be expected that we would drink Mimosa's this morning, Sarah put it best "My body is in rejection mode, no more alcohol!" Instead, a greasy lunch sans the sauce did us all good.
_______________________________________________________
We miss you Sarah, glad you came back "home" to play!